Tuesday, November 8, 2011

Don't worry about tomorrow....

Since I became a mom over 18 years ago my biggest source of worry has been my kids.  When they were babies I would go into their rooms while they were sleeping and put my hand on their backs and listen to make sure they were still breathing.  When they were toddlers I would worry about them falling down the stairs.  When they started school I would worry about them making friends and fitting in.  When they started playing sports I would worry that they would get hurt.  When they became teenagers I would worry that they would start hanging out with the wrong crowd and get into trouble.  When Cody started driving I would worry every time he left to go somewhere and would make him call me or text me as soon as he arrived somewhere....and if he forgot, you better believe I'd be calling so I could make sure he was ok.  And now with Cody getting ready to go away to college next year, I find myself already starting to worry.  As a mom, I don't think that I'll every quit worrying about my kids. 

Since I lost my mom at the age of 12, I have always worried about something happening to me and my kids being left without a mom because I know how hard that was for me.  It may sound weird, but it's been a very real struggle for me.  With every ache and pain I had, I could dream up something terrible that was wrong with me and that it was going to kill me....the invention of Google didn't help things because then I could diagnose myself based on my symptoms over the internet:)  When I fly somewhere I just know the plane might go down every time there is turbulence:)  I always hug on my kids before I leave to go out of town, even if just for a couple of days.  I also worry about something happening to Scott and being left a single mom.  It's silly I know, but true none the less.  I always tell him to be careful when he leaves to drive somewhere.  He's used to it and just laughs and shakes his head.  I guess I just know how life can change in an instant...it's happened to me.      

Sometimes I worry or stress about insignificant things that really aren't even that big of a deal.  I have to remind myself that there are much more important things to worry about.  I always tell Scott that it's a good thing he's not a worrier because I do it enough for the both of us:)  I actually am much better about this than I used to be...I even think my husband would agree.  We had something unexpected come up in the last few months that in the past would have made me sick with worry, but I really was at peace in the midst of it.  Scott even noticed and commented several times on how well and calmly I handled the situation.        

I have had to work and pray so often over the years for God to help me in this area of my life.  In the book of Matthew, Jesus talks about worry and there is a scripture I have had to go back to time and time again.  It says, "Seek first His Kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you.  Therefore do not worry about tomorrow for tomorrow will worry about itself.  Each day has enough trouble of its own."   (Matthew 6:33-34, NIV)  This scripture has been my constant prayer....that I would seek first His Kingdom and His righteousness and everything else will be taken care of....I'm so thankful for this promise.   I do believe I'm not the worrier I used to be and I know that a big part of that is because I've learned to lean on God for the peace that only He can bring.   

So the sixth thing I've learned in this countdown to my 40th birthday is that, "Worrying doesn't take away tomorrows troubles; it takes away todays peace"...author unknown.  I want to live in peace today and lean on God for all my tomorrows....   


1 comment:

  1. Good thoughts. I'm sure many of us share the worrying habit--and possibly some kind of worrying gene. I try to remember how it feels to be around a kooky, tense, person who sprays everyone with anxiety--and try not to be that person! :-D